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  • Writer's pictureKari Wetherill

The Union of Feminine & Masculine

“But there is no energy unless there is a tension of opposites; hence it is necessary to discover the opposite to the attitude of the conscious mind.” -Carl Jung

Within you, a cosmic dance of energetic polarities is taking place. Whether you are aware of it or not, there are two forces that are behind everything that you do, think, say, feel and experience.

It does not matter what your sexual identity is or what your gender preferences are, every human being on planet Earth has the feminine and masculine energies within them and they flow throughout every facet of our world and universe. If you are ready to bring these two forces into balance and experience the harmony of their union, then it is important to become aware of them, understand their differences, recognize when they are out of balance and seek to unite them.

The feminine and masculine forces are continuously looking for equilibrium. Theirs is a dance between love and power, being and doing, intuition and reason, the abstract and the literal, the artistic and the scientific, the subtle and the obvious, chaos and order. These two forces are polarities which provide a spectrum of energies in which you experience and interact with the world, your body, your emotions and your mind.

What are polarities?

Polarities are seemingly opposite forces which cannot exist without the other. The North and South Pole is a prime example as is the heads and tails of a coin. You cannot have a North Pole without the existence of a South Pole. The heads of a coin cannot exist without the tails also existing. There can be no in without out, no up without down and no left without right.

The law of polarities is the fabric that this world is built upon and the feminine and masculine forces are the underlying structure from which all other polarities arise. One is not better than the other as they cannot be compared and they cannot be separated. They are each other's integral counterpart. They balance one another and together they seek to work in unison to provide you with a language in which you experience and take part in your world and your life.

Energy traits of the feminine and masculine polarities

The feminine energy is open and receptive. It is a "being" energy in that it lies dormant and waits as pure potential. The masculine counterpart is penetrating and manipulating, giving shape to the potential energy in waiting. It is a "doing" energy.

The feminine is associated with intuition, nurturing, healing, allowing, stillness, patience and waiting. This energy is artistic, abstract and operates by feel. It is indirect and inward facing in that its effects are subtle, whereas the masculine is direct and outward facing in that its effects are apparent. The masculine allows us to take action by doing and moving forward. It is associated with power, drive, order, structure and getting things done. The masculine energy is scientific, literal and operates by reason.

The feminine is in waiting. In order to be expressed this force relies on the masculine to do something with it, for without the masculine energy the feminine would forever remain dormant. Without the feminine energy the masculine would have nothing to work with and any exerted force would be void. For instance, if we represent the feminine with water sitting at the bottom of a well, then the masculine would be the force from the pump which causes the water flow to your sink. If there is no (masculine) force generated by the pump, the (feminine) water remains dormant at the bottom of the well. If there is no water (feminine), the force of the pump (masculine) is useless.

So what does it look like to unite the feminine and the masculine?

As mentioned earlier, the feminine is inward and subtle whereas the masculine is outward and apparent. It is much easier to see the effects of the masculine and to ignore the feminine, often being completely blind to its existence. We measure, we categorize, we build, we work, we reason, we do. We have learned to measure productivity and in the process we forget that value cannot be measured. Love cannot be measured. Emotions cannot be measured. We find ourselves collectively in a state of energetic imbalance dominated by the masculine.

Now we must be careful here, because if we overcorrect ourselves we will miss the mark of unity and stray too far into the feminine. It is balance and harmony that we're seeking.

Remembering that the feminine is the creative, artistic, intuitive, allowing force and the masculine is the logical, literal, structuring, organizing force, think of a school or workplace setting. Imbalance would be having strict rules with no room for individual creativity or expression (masculine) or having too few of rules which allows for freedom of expression but, without guidelines nobody knows what to do (feminine). Balance would be having guidelines in place which create a structure (masculine) to enable direction and coherency while also being open and flexible (feminine) to bending the rules and allowing for individual expression.

This balance between these two energies is in constant flux. Their existence is fluid and, as conditions change, balance must be adjusted accordingly in order to be maintained. The energies are constantly in motion, so one doesn't reach a state of balance and then stop trying. It is like a surfboarder riding a wave. They don't just statically balance on the surfboard and wave without effort. In order to maintain their balance, every muscle, tendon and ligament is working together in unison. Every fiber of their being is holding, softening, pushing, releasing, pulling, waiting. When learning to surf, they will make mistakes and in the beginning they will overcorrect, straying too far one way or the other. However, time and practice bring fluidity and efficiency. The more they improve at this equilibrium, the more subtle their efforts become.

How do you balance these energies?

Each person is entirely unique and what you need to focus on to bring your energies into balance might be different from what someone else needs to focus on. Also, there are many different layers to how these energies express themselves. A person may have a dominant feminine energy in one aspect of their lives while also having a dominant masculine energy in another.

To give a general example of someone expressing a dominant feminine trait, imagine a person who might be highly creative yet tends to be unorganized and scattered. They have a hard time keeping to a schedule and come across as flaky or noncommittal. They tend to get distracted easily and seem to fly by the seat of their pants. This person might also be highly independent, spontaneous, free from obligations and ready for adventure! They don't get stuck in other people's rules and have an easier time expressing themselves. Since their strengths tend to come naturally, their focus should be on bringing in the weaker force. They might try to improve their organizational skills or build confidence in keeping plans by committing to small things. Giving themselves a general outline of what they want to accomplish will help to focus their chaotic energies so their creativity will become more potent and with less effort.

Someone expressing a dominant masculine trait might be a person who is very organized. They keep a tight schedule and are very committed. They like to have control and don't handle it well when their plans suddenly change. This person might even be a perfectionist. Their rigid scheduling leaves no room for creativity. They shut themselves off from spontaneity because it doesn't fit with their plans. Their relationships might suffer because they are usually unavailable. However, this person is highly motivated and get things done. When they set their sights on something, they are all in. In order to achieve balance, this person needs to acknowledge the messiness of life and seek improvement in letting go of so much control. They could use to let in some spontaneity and free themselves from their busy schedule once in a while.

These are just some examples of how these energies might express themselves. There are many layers and ways these two forces play out and it is important to note that whenever there is a weakness present, there are always strengths! We are not seeking to diminish the strengths, but to improve upon the weaknesses. When you are out of balance give attention to the weaker, more suppressed energy. When you put your awareness on something, it magnifies it. By bringing awareness to the traits you wish to improve, you magnify the strengths of the weaker expression. Then you are able to cultivate the strengths of the weaker expression and discover the power of their combined strengths when these forces are united. The more you balance every area of your life, the more harmonious your life will get. You will move beyond reacting and overcorrecting and discover a flow of equilibrium where you can truly begin to enjoy life and let yourself shine.

In Summary

When we are out of balance, it is the polarizing forces of the feminine and masculine energies which we are seeking to unite. These forces express themselves in many different ways and layers. They flow within you as well as through the nature and society which surrounds you.

One of the most important unions knocking at our door right now is that of the ancient wisdom traditions and that of our modern world of science and technology. The feminine energy is represented in the intuitive, feeling and spiritual cultures of the Eastern traditions as well as the Indigenous tribal traditions living in harmony with the natural world. The masculine energy is represented by our fast paced modern world built upon information, science and technology.

If we want to find the real power in uniting our deep wisdom and inner knowing with the incredible scientific and technological advances of our modern world, it is time we move out of an either/or mindset (imbalance) and into an equilibrium between the two where our mindset is a balance of both/and.

We will forever limit ourselves if we insist upon remaining in a state of polarity. Just as the deep wisdom cultures of spirit and nature could use to benefit from the science and technology of the modern world, so too could the modern world use to benefit from the deep wisdom only found through stillness and contemplation.

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